her mother died 2 weeks ago.
I told her I’m sorry but after thinking about what to say I couldn’t come with anything better than repeating sorry again. She then told me and another coworker how she died.
I want to show her that I care but I don’t want her mother’s death to become the elephant in the room each time we talk.
This is not romantic in any way.
I heard a great podcast with Frank Ostaseski where he talked about how isolating death is. No one wants to bring up what happened, because it may upset you (spoiler: you are already upset) and you don’t want to burden others by talking about it. This traps you into dealing with it alone. I think the best thing you can do is just be available. Tell them you are genuinely want to listen if they want to talk about it. Perhaps make the offer again in a few weeks when others have moved on. No pressure, just be open to listening. Most of us just want to be heard