I WFH, every year one of the goals that the rest of the team decides is that it’s “so great” to see each other in person. The past few years haven’t worked out but one did. I spent hours in a couple of airports, the huge expense for the company, I spent days away from my family, and for what? So you could look me in my same face you would see if we turned cameras on every once in a while? My husband says I’m being weird, but I legitimately want to know, what is the benefit? I hate being there and have to play nice so you can…look me even closer in the face?

  • V0uges@jlai.lu
    3·
    8 months ago

    All of my adult friends I met at work. We all live hundred of km away from each other but go to our respective office 2 days a week. And on those days, we have lunch and drinks, they are my children godparents and we talk everyday. As a grown up if you move long distance, it is a lot harder to make friends and keep up with the older ones. You may not have a lot of time because of children especially is they are on the younger side. So your pool to get local mates becomes the school parents and work. It’s a lot easier to determine who you’d like to hang out with with people you spend 8 hours a day 5 days a week that the other mums you only see a few times a week as you all rush off your bicycle to drop you kid at school and have a very superficial relationship with.

    • Stromatose@lemmy.world
      1·
      8 months ago

      Obviously some different life circumstances influence your options of making new friends as an adult. I can certainly understand your perspective there but perhaps it’s hard for me to relate since my significant other and I have no children nor do our friend and none of us desire to ever have them either.

      I’m sure they consume a great deal of time and energy that probably drives a person to crave social experiences away from them. If work is the only place they can get away from them I can understand that too but hobbies can still be an option.

      World feels overcrowded as it is. Getting a shit deal because so many others choose to have kids and then want to force people to spend time trapped in a box with them… It’s like a whole population of people having their cake and eating it too… Or whatever expression fits best here for an unfair, double-dipping advantage…

      And actually now that I think of it, two of our friend group did have kids and we all drifted apart because they were no longer able to commit time and weekends like we did to each other.

      They used to often say “we should all hang out again!” and such but then either we’re never available or had to leave early or host events at their place which required interacting with their kids and I gotta say toddlers are not skillful conversationalists.

      I don’t have a solution for people with kids trying to find friends at work. I can understand why it might seem appealing to them but speaking from the other side, it feels like a burden I shouldn’t have to carry.