Ever heard of the cable channel TLC? You might change you assessment…

They do. They’re just drones, tho.

Remember the poors killing that sweet, innocent healthcare denier? Well, DON’T!

LOOK! DRONES!

Well I’ll be hornswoggled in duck sauce! Asked and delivered!

Which fictional billionaire has more money, Forest Gump, or Bruce Wayne? This is the head to head i want to see.

“Taylor Hanson is a boy?!? OH GAWD…!”

Blue Cross backpedaled real fuckin’ hard on the whole “we won’t pay for your surgeries anesthesia” things right after.

What? I haven’t fallen into a toilet once since they created the TSA. Those seatbelts are a life saver.

Terroristic threats! Bake him away, toys!

Fuckin’ A.

Hey Luxembourg, you broke it, you bought it! She’s YOUR fucking problem now! AHAHAHA!

scene

No? Still in this timeline? …fuck.

Full-on mask off, now. Owner class protecting owner class, nothing to see here. These aren’t the droids you’re looking for. Move along.

Nancy “McConnell” Pelosi, still hard at work, fucking over America for personal gain.

“I love the uneducated!”

In a comment full of shit takes, i just wanna point out that you think the government teaching media literacy in school is the solution?

I hope you wear a helmet regularly.

Use it to fill the holes in your canoe?

14 million is 4% of 345 million (~American population.) Yes, 96% of America thought he wasn’t gonna run again.

Did Putin tell Moscow Mitch to say that? Was it Monsanto? Or, did he have his own thought for once?

You’re right, he never said the exact words. But all of America was under the impression he was gonna step back. He never used the direct words to dispell that either. I’m not alone in feeling betrayed by Biden.

I used to work in a pizza place, and the head cook was from Mexico working on his citizenship. He helped me with my Spanish, and I’d help him with his English. One day, we discovered that jokes was a good way to discover any loss in translations, so jokes became our preferred method of conversation.

One day he said he’s got a great joke, but he’s not sure if it’ll work in English, so he’s asks to tell me if it works. I tell him to hit me. The joke:

A guy and his girlfriend have been together long enough to move in with each other. Being a new(ish) couple, they’re still pretty frisky. Every time they’re finished and basking in the after glow, she plays with his junk, just gently kneading the balls in their sack. After a few months, he asks her why does she always play with his balls afterwards. She looks him dead in the eye with a Mona Lisa smile, gently kisses his lips and whispers in his ear “because i miss mine.”

He asked if the joke works in English. When i quit laughing, i said it does. That was 2006, and it’s still one of my favorite jokes to this day.