The problem here is you chose two non-controverisal books that have harder themes but are still mostly pg. I would argue most parents editor give their 10yo the silmarillion, but i highly doubt many would give them Game of Thrones.
‘Appropriate for children’ is what I have an issue with.
Withholding knowledge because of an arbitrary line is the antithesis of learning. Who gets to determine what is appropriate and for whom?
If my kid wants to read something with content that’s more mature, I’m ok with that. If I’ve read it, I’ll warn them of the more shaky bits that they’ll come across and what is and isn’t ok especially relative to their age and mentality.
If they bring home fifty shades, I’ll have a discussion about it with them and the concepts of consent as well as body autonomy and let them know that what happens in that book are not that.
The parents at that age. Also, let’s not kid ourselves, if you had a kid at that age you wouldn’t let them read fifty shades, you would take it and explain it had adult themes and they can read it when they’re an adult.
If they bring home fifty shades, I’ll treat it just as if they brought in Dean Koontz or a copy of Grendel. I’d have a frank discussion about how not all books and writers are good. They can read it as examples of either what not to do or as warning signs to look out for, either in literature in general or in people’s actions. I’d also recommend better stories that they’ll enjoy more.
If they bring home books I do enjoy but have either problematic contents or authors, I’ll treat it just the same. I love Asimov but the way he wrote women was gratuitously sexist. Lovecraft was xenophobic. Rowling is a terf and her house elves and goblins are definitely not good. Etc etc etc
And advise that they may get in trouble if they read it in front of some people because they have this weird hangup about preventing children from recognizing toxic relationships or the realities of the world.
If they’re old enough to understand the words and concepts in the book, it doesn’t do them any good to pretend like they don’t exist.
Again, withholding knowledge and understanding because people think the children must be protected reduces their own agency and tools to understand the world.
Have you read Fifty Shades? There should be zero debate the book is soft core porn. Even if you want to have a discussion about toxic relationships or any of its other themes you can provide age appropriate books with those themes. You are not witholding information, you are stopping your fifth grader from reading smut. As the parent of a young kid you should be monitoring what they watch and consume.
It’s not even very good softcore porn. Tell me, at what age is reading about people having sex where one of the two uses their power and money to trick the other into thinking that they’re loved and not just some playboys breathing sex doll appropriate?
Edit: monitor? Yes. Actively discuss about? If they want to.
If fifty shades interests them even after talking over what it’s about, that’s fine. They’re allowed to make mistakes to learn from. Our jobs as parents are to teach them and to help them figure out who they are, not hide them away from society and keep them in ignorance as long as possible.
The problem here is you chose two non-controverisal books that have harder themes but are still mostly pg. I would argue most parents editor give their 10yo the silmarillion, but i highly doubt many would give them Game of Thrones.
I chose notoriously difficult books to get through. I’d have the same opinion for ‘the joy of sects’ and ‘the joy of sex’
Difficult to get through does not equal appropriate for children. A kid can read a hard book, plenty do.
‘Appropriate for children’ is what I have an issue with.
Withholding knowledge because of an arbitrary line is the antithesis of learning. Who gets to determine what is appropriate and for whom?
If my kid wants to read something with content that’s more mature, I’m ok with that. If I’ve read it, I’ll warn them of the more shaky bits that they’ll come across and what is and isn’t ok especially relative to their age and mentality.
If they bring home fifty shades, I’ll have a discussion about it with them and the concepts of consent as well as body autonomy and let them know that what happens in that book are not that.
The parents at that age. Also, let’s not kid ourselves, if you had a kid at that age you wouldn’t let them read fifty shades, you would take it and explain it had adult themes and they can read it when they’re an adult.
If they bring home fifty shades, I’ll treat it just as if they brought in Dean Koontz or a copy of Grendel. I’d have a frank discussion about how not all books and writers are good. They can read it as examples of either what not to do or as warning signs to look out for, either in literature in general or in people’s actions. I’d also recommend better stories that they’ll enjoy more. If they bring home books I do enjoy but have either problematic contents or authors, I’ll treat it just the same. I love Asimov but the way he wrote women was gratuitously sexist. Lovecraft was xenophobic. Rowling is a terf and her house elves and goblins are definitely not good. Etc etc etc
And advise that they may get in trouble if they read it in front of some people because they have this weird hangup about preventing children from recognizing toxic relationships or the realities of the world.
If they’re old enough to understand the words and concepts in the book, it doesn’t do them any good to pretend like they don’t exist.
Again, withholding knowledge and understanding because people think the children must be protected reduces their own agency and tools to understand the world.
Have you read Fifty Shades? There should be zero debate the book is soft core porn. Even if you want to have a discussion about toxic relationships or any of its other themes you can provide age appropriate books with those themes. You are not witholding information, you are stopping your fifth grader from reading smut. As the parent of a young kid you should be monitoring what they watch and consume.
It’s not even very good softcore porn. Tell me, at what age is reading about people having sex where one of the two uses their power and money to trick the other into thinking that they’re loved and not just some playboys breathing sex doll appropriate?
Edit: monitor? Yes. Actively discuss about? If they want to. If fifty shades interests them even after talking over what it’s about, that’s fine. They’re allowed to make mistakes to learn from. Our jobs as parents are to teach them and to help them figure out who they are, not hide them away from society and keep them in ignorance as long as possible.
Exactly, it’s bad porn, give them a better, more age appropriate book.