Conservative-friendly headline: Crime Wave of Illegal Immigrants

“Liberal Media” headline: Um actually, as it happens, sir, the thing is you see that numbers - we did numbers of it, that is a thorough review of words and numbers related to the reality of the situation shows that in fact there does not appear to be a factual or clearly identifiable basis for that being a thing that is which we could maybe be wrong about but we feel pretty good about the numbers even.

Advantage: fascists.