I always thought of it like this: if a workplace makes you feel devalued or is toxic (gaslighting and ranting about you behind your back), you quietly find new pastures.
Now, however, I think this is the wrong approach: why do I have to accept they bully me? I should defend myself. And doesn’t the manager have to make sure a workplace ain’t toxic? Instead of quietly looking for a new job next time this happens, wouldn’t it be better to confront, document and escalate instead of letting it go? even if HR only exists to protect the company and not me.
If HR and manager do nothing to address the problem, wouldn’t it be a better strategy to start working the least possible and let the company fire me, while looking for another job?
Unless they need you more than you need them, announcing your intent to leave “unless…” puts you in a more difficult negotiating position because you have signaled you have other options that, perhaps more challenging for you, are an easier solution than them having to fix it for you. HR isn’t your friend.
Practically and more directly, if you can be easily replaced then your workplace issues are yours. If you are difficult or expensive to replace, your workplace issues are theirs.
Take it from experience @vestmoria@linux.community this advice is true. Going to HR means that they’re going to take action on the one causing the most noise, and when you go to them at that moment, that’s you. That may sound discouraging, but that’s what it is. Something like gossip is something HR will be willing to ignore. By going to them you are creating the most noise so it will only adversely affect you.
It doesn’t matter if you’re right. It doesn’t matter if you’re a great employee. You are officially making negative noise, that’s a liability for the company. They’ll smooth you over, tell you there’s a plan, but it’s officially on record that you’ll speak up while others quietly work, and in the corporate world that’s a black mark.
Take it from me, just silently start looking for new work. Right now you have all the time in the world, search around, be picky, get something better. Leave them behind you. That’s the only real way to propel your career forward.
Depends. HR maybe see your complaint and decide “I should take care of this workplace harassment before someone wisens up and talks to a lawyer”
I would say talk to HR, but not until you’ve actually got another job lined up.
Maybe they think ahead and take care of the problem, maybe they just sweep shit under the rug. It depends on the HR rep in question.
I’ve seen that, but with a little twist.
why would I want to work where people try destroying my credibility behind my back? This is not something I’m willing to overlook.
If HR acts like you described, if I’m that replaceable to them, so is my workplace.
The others don’t work quietly, btw.
ETA: wait, are you implying this is normalized? Employees do actually say nothing not to land in hot water, because they’re afraid of being fired and are willing to overlook the gossip and backstabbing for a check? Not for me.
By work quietly I mean they don’t go to HR when there are problems. I think you misinterpreted me though, I’m saying if it’s bad enough you want to go to HR, then it’s probably bad enough where you could just look for other jobs.
thank you
To add to what scrubbles said, the looking for another job part of very important here. Blowing the whistle on your current colleagues may result in your boss not giving you as great of a reference as they otherwise may have. The best way to handle a hostile workplace is to leave the hostile workplace, unless there are blatantly outright illegal things being done to you. And sadly, depending on what those things are, even then…