• danc4498@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    If they think “stoned” means killed, then that directly conflicts with the commandment “thou shouldn’t kill people”.

    Since the Bible can’t possibly contradict itself, it must mean to get high.

    • funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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      7 months ago

      after getting the stone tablet with Thou Shalt Not Kill on it, Moses takes his entourage and immediately genocides an entire kingdom. It’s right there in the Bible, I don’t think they are that concerned about consistency

      • MyFairJulia@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        You don‘t get it. Moses just beat the enemies with the stone tables to really hammer in the rules. It‘s not his fault the people are dying of the injuries.

      • BlitzoTheOisSilent@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Just like The Tower of Babel (I think). The people are building a giant tower, basically, and God doesn’t like it because it would prove to humanity that they don’t need God (for some reason).

        So he orders his followers to slaughter all of them and destroy the temple, to remind them they need God.

        I don’t think this God guy is as nice as people claim him to be.

        • LifeBandit666@feddit.uk
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          7 months ago

          And then God invented different languages to create barriers to humans working together so it would never happen again

      • danc4498@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Damn, that’s probably what they believe.

        He made 10 commandments that He personally etched on a stone tablet. So clear and easy to understand.

        But for all the exceptions to this stone tablet he had humans write them in random pages in the old testament.

          • danc4498@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            If you believe the lore, at least the 10 commandments were written BY god. The only thing we have that is written BY god says not to kill. And we’re going to allow humans to write in exceptions?

            • melpomenesclevage@lemm.ee
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              7 months ago

              Yes because they validate my prejudices and make my life easier.

              Otherwise I’d have to be right about stuff to be this sanctimonious; that sounds both difficult and unpleasant.

        • SonnyVabitch@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          The Ten Commandments appear three times in the Bible, and there’s no reward for guessing correctly whether the versions are consistent with one another.

          • danc4498@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            Do any of them include an appendix with all the exceptions listed?

            Honestly, I think the somebody should work on this. Create a version of the 10 commandments with all the exceptions written onto separate tablets. Then any time Christians try to get the 10 commandments posted into a building, just add the appendix tablets.

      • Duamerthrax@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Poe’s Law.

        Your original comment had no punchline and wasn’t ridiculous enough not to be plausible said by a fundie.

    • ji59@kbin.social
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      7 months ago

      No, people shouldn’t kill them, only throw rocks at them. If they die, it’s Gods will and nobody could do anything about it, only send thoughts and prayers